"Love and Marriage"

Bishop Phil & Pastor Sharell Brownlee

Both of us Having been previously married and held office as senior pastors at two different churches, between the two of us we have almost 50 years of marital experience. We are now and have been counseling married couples, offering couples counseling and pre marriage counseling, today we would like to touch on just four or five aspects from our counseling sessions, this is just a summary of how we work hopefully it will give you tools to make better decisions and possibly enrich and increase the potency of your marriage.

If you hear anything that interests you feel free to contact us from the information below.

1. Ready for Love

Before you can embark in any relationship you must first do a self-examination to make sure that your past relationships, past hurts, unresolved issues with family and others have been dealt with, you should work on being healthy both physically and sexually, you should first enrich your personal spiritual relationship with God making sure that you are whole In your worship and service to God before bringing another person into that scenario, knowing that this will take some time.

2. After you say I do

It's a good idea to occasionally go over Basic wedding vows with your spouse,( I take you to be my wife/ husband to have and to hold from this day forward for better or worse for richer or poorer in sickness and in health) and ask them how you are doing at keeping your vows.

Imagine scenarios on each vow how you would respond to job loss or having an illness, gaining weight, an old flame popping up, if they backslide or change their religion ,This will both give you a reality of your wedding vows, prepare you for upcoming problems and situations and give you insight to better understand How your mate responds to problem solving and working together as a team.

3. Unadulterated Communication

You have heard it said that communication is the key to any relationship, that communication must be unadulterated meaning not mixed with lies half truths or extra elements that don't pertain to what is being discussed, both parties should be willing to listen and put themselves in the other person's shoes sometimes taking a break to truly consider others feelings, emotional state and even thinking of how they process things.

4. Bonding with the Q’s                                                         

When creating a lasting bond with your mate you need to consider their ability for adversity. You have heard of IQ intelligence quota a score derived from a set of standardized test to assess human intelligence, when dealing in relationships I want to introduce You to EQ, SQ and AQ. EQ. Emotional Quota - how your mate deals with emotional stress such as menopause, midlife crisis, when a person reinvents themselves, losing loved ones, this can change the marriage.     SQ. Spiritual Quota - the level of your mate's spirituality, their ability to catch or relate with you in the spirit, your commitment to the church and dealing with spiritual leaders. AQ. Adaptability Quota - their ability to stay in love when major aspects of life began to change, life in an empty nest, when age begins to change your interests.

5. Till death do us part                                                         

Have you talked with your mate About being with them no matter what, About being in love when you don't feel in love, about coming home when you don't want to come home, about the covenant relationship that you made with God that we are no longer twain but have become one always and forever...

May your marriage bring you all the fulfillment and marriage should bring and may the Lord give you patience tolerance and understanding, remember that every burden is easier to carry when you have the shoulders of two instead of 1, be thankful to one another in your thoughts and deeds and above all be faithful to Jesus, may you see the marriage be it as an altar of grace and pleasure, each time you speak to one another remember you were talking to someone that God has given to you, if any indifference pushes you apart may you have the good sense to take the first step back and always say forgive me I forgive you and never stop saying I love you...

Phil and Sharell Brownlee                                                               

Peace Tabernacle Church

3514 Oregon 63118                                                   

314-243-1886 

pastorphiljohn316@gmail.com